Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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