Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I have post one night stand depression
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