i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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