I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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