She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
