Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
