I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize