garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
