I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
