So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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