The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
