We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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