Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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