More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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