In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
My legs feel like baby dolphins
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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