That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
