i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
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