upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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