Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
third nipple confirmed
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize
