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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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