Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize