You just made me feel so damn special
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Randomize
