All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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