i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
