You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
