Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize
