You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
