need another drink. this is the easiest way
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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