My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
