Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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