I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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