Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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