i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
