I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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