idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
