Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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