Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
True college students do jello shots in the library
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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