I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
How's work?
Spinning.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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