Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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