I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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