so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
