I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Randomize
