It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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