Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
