So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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