She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
do nipples grow back?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
