Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
