saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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