What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
