i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
